I've become One of the Pod People!
My wife has turned me into one of "those people".
I used to walk into Starbucks and order quickly, easily, simply.
"I'll have a Venti (strongest Coffee of the Day)".
The cashier would take my money, quickly pour a cup, hand it to me and send me on my way. A shot of Half and Half and I was out the door. The whole thing took maybe a minute to transact.
I always hated those people who would walk up to the counter and order like this:
"I'll have a Grande, no whip, half caff, extra hot, double shot, skim Americano with sprinkles...."
The cashier would holler the order to a Barrista. The Barrista would repeat the order back, like we're on a nuclear powered submarine, filming a sequel to The Hunt for Red October.
I just wanted to grab the person and yell, "Just get a cup of hot brown water and get out of here!"
OK...I'll admit....in the summer time, I would occasionally try a cool, refreshing Frappuccino.
But it was only every now and then and I could quit any time I wanted.
Then my wife made me try her latte.
She's smart, my wife. She knows, like any good crack dealer, you give 'em the first hit free.
That first one was good....not as good as a straight up Sumatra but not bad. And then I started to experiment. And that's when things started to go horribly wrong.
Now, here's what I order when I go to Starbucks:
"I'll have a Grande, extra hot, triple shot non fat latte".
Kill me now....